Does Friendship Matter in Marriage?

Who are Marco and Venice Goldsmith?  Well they are a Master Chef and Ophthalmologist, respectively, who spawned a love affair that eventually led them down the aisle, to the altar, and over the marriage broom.  Soon after, however, their happily ever after turned into a horror show and after countless arguments and near physical exchanges, they decided to get a divorce.

Marco and Venice Goldsmith are fictional characters in my upcoming novel titled “14-Pages.”  However, their situation is unfortunately not fictional.  Divorce happens.  People who were once friends somehow fall apart and get to the point where they don’t even want to be in the same room with each other.  But how does it happen?

Divorce is a path to freedom and happiness to some and to others a source of pain and disappointment.  I experienced it from a child’s eye twice and I can tell you that pain and disappointment were very much a part of both experiences. Someone else may have experienced something totally different, perhaps even an amicable parting where friendship is continued.  The outcome can be different but the start and middle are usually the same: two people come together and then they grow apart.

I write about this in my upcoming novel “14-Pages” from a place of reflection.  I reflect on my love for my wife of 12 years.  I want to stay married to her forever. That is a choice that we have made and we have to consciously remind ourselves of when times get rocky.  I reflect on my parent’s divorce.  Those times were painful for my mother and father and later my step-father (my mother married and divorced twice).  I reflect on the many stories that I’ve heard and read about and I came to the conclusion that they all have something in common. At some point in time, something brought two people together—attraction, lust, love, convenience—it was something and it was strong enough to cause them to get married.  What I don’t know—and perhaps will never know unless I polled every divorcee ever—is did every relationship begin in friendship.

I finished my novel and I can’t wait for the world to find out whether or not Marco and Venice Goldsmith save their marriage. I also can’t wait for the world to answer the question (hopefully in the form of reviews) of whether or not Marco and Venice started off as friends.  Do you have to?  Do you have to be friends before you get married?  Does the presence or absence of friendship predetermine the success of marriage?

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About jamesfantbooks

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This entry was posted in arguments, disagreements, Family, relationships and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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